Just in case you aren't quite sure who is appearing tonight

SOURCE: Cleveland Plain Dealer Online

Cookie used to love reading the newspaper. It set my world straight for the day. When we moved from the Eastern Seaboard to the Midwest, it was a bit of a jolt. Alas, The Cleveland Plain Dealer which used to be a very fine paper is now no longer just that. Instead of yesterday's news, the next morning, now the news that they claim is content can be from two days ago to two months ago. The breaking content is minimal.

This probably is from their TV listing feed - something they don't have anything to do with. In the publishing world, when I used to write romance novels in the early 80s, we used to refer to a certain type of padding as "Fuckie Fudging". Lots of ooooooh's and ahhhhh's to up the word count on seducing (not sex, seduction) scenes. Well, isn't this an example of a type of Fuckie Fudging?

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Collect them all, part II: STAMP TRAMPS

New this week at the Grumblat, Ohio, post office are these spiffy stamps, celebrating the winners of the 1951 Miss Postal Workers Contest. We have (Clockwise) Miss First Class Delivery, Miss C.O.D., Miss Book Rate, Miss Postage Due, Miss Delivered in a Brown Wrapper, Miss Registered Mail, Miss Certified Mail, Miss Rural Free Delivery and in the center, Miss Special Delivery. Be sure to get yours today, and remember, collecting stamps is FUN for the entire family!

Hey everybody, the new phone booths are here!

Mixed marriages never work

We all knew that the bride was heading for heartbreak. She married the Tapioca Prince, but it didn't work out because he wouldn't touch her, and she was not gonna let that gunky lunky white stuff slide down her throat. They were on an espresso track to a dessert, when she decided that like all 1950s girls, she would commit to her husband because in heart she loved him. And because no one really likes a canned Danish ham go to waste. Admit it. Now that you have seen Princess Spamalot, you are tight like two dollar watch because your caterer never gave you this option. That buffet plate needed a little bit-o-height, but not enough to outshine the cake. Marry in haste, reception at leisure. Now that you know what your friends are missing, take one to their wedding. The secret is that dressed meat is hiding a crocheted toilet paper holder for a skirt attached. This centerpiece goes from the buffet table to the bathroom just like you will!

Krab, with a "K"

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